Sunday, October 4, 2009

Beer And Meat Diet

For all those familiar with my now famous 'beer and popcorn diet', that I developed for reducing increased weight due to the consumption of vast quantities of home brewed beer, you will be pleased to know that I have developed a new and improved diet that is vastly more effective on a number of levels and satisfactorily replaces the 'beer and popcorn diet'.

Introducing the new 'Beer and Meat Diet'.

I have found this new diet to be superior in that it provides the important vitamin, mineral and energy that the popcorn lacked. If you are still on the 'beer and popcorn diet', I apologize for this inconvenient and unexpected announcement, but I think you will find that the 'beer and meat diet' is more effective for reducing the unwanted pounds associated with homebrew consumption.
Like the 'beer and popcorn diet' plan, do not consume any calories from carbohydrates other than those provided in your beer consumption. That's right, just eat a moderate portion of meat only for each meal and your normal intake of homebrewed beer. It's that simple. Watch the pounds melt away as you wash down that Tri-tip steak with a pint of pale ale. I've found that half a pound of bacon and a juice glass full of stout for breakfast make for a great start to any day. Caution: an unfortunate side effect of this new diet plan is an increase in the amount of dirty dishes that need to be washed.

At this point you may be asking yourself, "what about exercise? Would that help in any way?"
I can't help but laugh when I hear people say that. Sure you could exercise if you want an early death, I'm just kidding. But seriously, I wouldn't recommend it if you're fairly old. Science has proven that a sudden burst of unexpected exercise brought on by health concerns in older men can dislodge plaque or something from your blood veins that will shoot to your brain or heart killing you instantly. I wouldn't even consider exercise of any sort if you're over fifty. But, that's just me, risk it if you feel lucky. In any case, what would be helpful is the following information to calculate the amount of calories that are in your beer.

Credit is given to Peter A. Ensminger. Condensed from the Home Brew Digest website.

The number of calories in beer, all of which come from alcohol and carbohydrates, can be estimated from measurements of specific gravity before and after fermentation. The ASBC ["Caloric Content, Beer-33" in: American Society of Brewing Chemists, 1992, Methods of Analysis of the ASBC. American Society of Brewing Chemists; Homebrew Digest 800-9] gives a formula for calculating calories in beer:

cal per 12 oz beer = [(6.9 × ABW) + 4.0 × (RE - 0.1)] × FG × 3.55

The first item in brackets gives the caloric contribution of ethanol, which is determined from the ABW and the known value of 6.9 cal/g of ethanol. The second item in brackets gives the caloric contribution of carbohydrates, which is determined from the *RE (see eq. 2) and the known value of 4.0 cal/g for carbohydrates. An empirically-derived constant (0.1) accounts for the ash portion of the extract. Together, these terms give the calories per 100 g beer. This is easily converted to calories per 100 ml beer by accounting for the final gravity (FG, in (g beer)/(ml beer)). In turn, 100 ml is converted to 12 oz by a scalar (3.55, in (100ml/12 oz)).

Example: The original gravity of a wort is 1.070 and the final gravity of the resulting beer is 1.015. How many calories in a 12 oz bottle?

cal per 12 oz beer = [(6.9 × 5.72) + 4.0 × (6.21 - 0.1)] × 1.015 × 3.55 = 230

divide 230 by 12 and then multiply by 16 will give your calories in a pint or 307 (rounded up).

* 2. Real ExtractEthanol has a density of 0.79 g/ml at 20 °C, so its presence in beer, along with the loss of sugars due to fermentation, also reduces the specific gravity of beer relative to wort. The "Real Extract" (RE, in °P) is a measure of the sugars which are fermented and accounts for the density lowering effects of alcohol. The Real Extract is calculated from the initial and final densities (in °P) and an old empirically derived formula from Karl Balling [see Homebrew Digest 880-9]:
(2) RE = (0.1808 × °Pi) + (0.8192 × °Pf)
Example: The specific gravity of a wort is 1.070 and that of the resulting beer is 1.015 (measured at 20 °C). What is the Real Extract?According to eq. 2RE = (0.1808 × 17.06) + (0.8192 × 3.82) = 6.21 °P

Comment if you can read the fine print.


Anonymous said...

eww, just imagine what that bacon is doing to your innards :P I find a beer and veggie diet is better. Like a nice pale ale with steamed broccoli. Or an IPA with a veggie burger with cheese, and cheesy fry's at Seabright... yum.


Anonymous said...

No, you nead the meat for the protein and fat. Meat n beer!

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